It is before six in the morning. I went to bed after 11 last night. I have been up four times during the night with her. And we are leaving in less than hour for a train to Folly Farm with our home ed group.
I am exhausted.
Stiff with the rheumatoid arthritis.
More than a bit apprehensive of the almost two hour train journey and more meltdowns.
And totally, utterly committed to giving my autistic child this opportunity.
Because that is my job…my duty….my responsibility as a parent.
I have done everything I can think of to make this trip good for her. Her Kiddy Zoom action cam…and watch…extra batteries. Fully charged iPad. Maclaren Major buggy. Frozen water to thaw so she will have a supply of extra cold H2O. Packed her current favorite snacks. And arranged for extra support with her carer.
I am off now to straighten the kitchen. I have already made wraps for Cookie Monster to eat while we are away. Because he is important too.
I am taking my supplements now. I have packed ibuprofen for my pain…and won’t try being brave this time.
Oh, and lest I forget I am wearing my Wonder Woman knickers…and my Proud Mom of a #HappilyAutistic Human t-shirt.
I am loaded for bear this morning!
Have I forgotten anything? Probably! And even if I did not…there is no guarantee that things will go smoothly. But I do my best. My best to give PanKwake the life that she wants and deserves.
Because that is the responsibility I accepted when I choose to have a child…neurotypical or neurodivergent.